Owls in the bathroom

There’s not much to do when you are bed-ridden with only the bed bugs and mosquitoes for company, other than to stare at the ceiling, count the cracks and calculate exactly how much time the square inch of paint will take to peel right off and fall on you. So when the doctor ordered complete bed rest for an excruciating back pain recently, this is pretty much all I did.

Of the bed bugs and mosquitoes, there’s precious little to tell. They visited me often and at all hours of day and night, the bed bugs whispering local gossip into my ears and the mosquitoes bringing tidings from far off places. The paint ...

Read the full article in the June 2010 issue of Horizon Magazine


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1190 words
Humour
Canada publication

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Words from the Wise

"This was fun to read"

Lorna Loveless

Editor

BackHome

"Lovely story"

Nicola Ross

Editor

Alternatives

"A clever and feisty tale - and a nice reminder that we should not underestimate how clever and nimble our fellow creatures truly are."

Erica Dorpalen

for the editor

Orion

"Your story is written in an interesting style - very expressive. The unusual situation of having
an owl sitting on your toilet bowl is a great image."

David Peters

Editor

Fried Fiction

"This author has a knack for dry humor layered into complex language. There are many nicely-turned phrases in this piece"

Anonymous

Manuscript Reader

Quality Fiction

"It has merit"

Veronica Ross

Manuscript Reader

Antigonish Review

"We very much enjoyed reading it"

Tim Kroenert

Associate Editor

Eureka Street

"Interesting concept, an owl in the toilet"

Anonymous

Editor (1 of 6)

Flashquake

"I enjoyed reading the opening paragraph"

Anonymous

Editor (2 of 6)

Flashquake

The ties that bind

I am around eight years old and totally flummoxed. My mother has just posed the following conundrum to me:
“Two pairs of mothers and daughters went to the market and bought three lemons. They each got a whole lemon. How is that possible?”

Resisting the urge to just stare at her and blurt out that she is joking, I carefully go over the riddle word by word. After five minutes of straining the grey cells, I am nowhere near the answer. Five more frustrating minutes with numerous fractions worked out infront of me, and I utterly give up. Mum smiles and explains, “The two pairs were: a Grandmother, a Mother...

Read the full article in the Summer 2010 issue of Ducts

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2025 wordsEssay
US publication

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Words from the Wise

"I liked this essay... I thought your subject and tone were interesting... The description of the family writing its history is very funny... I do like the topic and think there's gentle comedy and potentially something profound about the piece... I'd love to have this essay... You did a marvelous job of bringing the essay to a conclusion, and I had the good kind of chill going down my back as I read your final paragraph. You cogently and eloquently explained the reason for this endearing tradition, and I suspect that many Americans may end up being more than a little jealous of not having such a tradition after reading your account and its meaning... Again, this was really a wonderful result... Congratulations."

Elizabeth Rosen

Essays and Memoirs Editor

Ducts

"I thought this was a very interesting story and compelling to read"

Diana Lyles

CEO

Scribblers and Ink Spillers